NOTE TO READERS: I actually started writing this before I had seen Treyís bit about politics. I thought at first that maybe three postings about politics would be too much. After reading his stuff, I realized that my piece still fit perfectly. Youíve got Hydeís feelings on her candidateís losing and youíve got Treyís stuff about all the stuff heís heard and read and whatever. Both of these people seem pretty adamant about taking an active role in our nationís futureóthey felt strongly in one direction or another, they paid attention, they made educated choices. Iím very adamant about NOT taking an active role. And I feel my people need representation on the website.
Iíve made it to after five in the morning. Portly Boy 27 is finished, and to go on any further in this strange a mindset wouldnít do the 28th the justice it deserves. But it seems like the perfect mindset to rant about Hydeís last entry. Iím referring to her weepy little episode about the election.
Sorry, Iím trying not to get all derogatory. But people who whine about which president weíve elected just seem to get on my nerves. Why? No good reason. The only thing I can think of is that people have forced their politics on me.
Iím walking down the street, and Iím suddenly surrounded by all these assholes telling me about how No Blood For Oil, how Bush Kills, how Vote For Kerry. And Iím late for work because of these numb bastards who apparently donít have jobs to go to. Screw Kerry, and screw all his minions, too. And if it was people getting all up in my face about how Kerry was Satan because he promoted Gay Marriage, then screw Bush.
I realize Iím using entirely too many curse words and capital letters, but I just donít care at this point.
I didnít vote this year, and Iím proud of that fact. Well, maybe not PROUD, per say, but Iím glad I didnít. When some jackass comes up to me with a cheap-ass t-shirt that proclaims ďDonít Blame Me: I Voted For KerryĒ and asks me who I voted for, I donít spare a second of thought before I reply, ďI didnít vote.Ē I do this with full knowledge of the fact that Iím going to have to waste at least two and half minutes of my life-time listening to this jackass ranting on about how itís my civil duty to vote. And my life-time is very important to me (the hyphen is intentional, by the way. Itís not lifetime, itís life-time, if you can dig it).
And then I tell this loser with the t-shirt, ďKerryís face freaks me out. Had I voted, it would have been a vote for Bush.Ē And then, if Iím lucky, they shut the hell up and go away. If Iím not lucky, they rant on and on about how blah blah blah. I never listen. Maybe this guy with his wild stinky hair and his stupid shirt has a good point about politics, but heís wasting my life-time, and if Iím not in a position where I can walk away, I try to put him in a situation where he wants to walk away.
My vote would have been an uneducated vote. Because Iíve had my own stuff to deal with. I moved, I started a new job (kind of), Iíve got problems in my life that has nothing to do with general population of the country. What Iím saying is, I wasnít really paying attention, other than half-assed, and it would NOT have been an educated decision. In my head, I just started thinking about having to see Kerryís face every time there was some important national issue. This would be the man that popped up on my television, interrupting The Simpsons, wrecking my Saturday morning cartoons, and showing up on any newspaper or magazine I happen to glance at for the next four years.
And his face freaks me out. He gives me the creeps. And letís face it: love him or hate him, George W. makes for some great entertainment. I mean, the guyís a goofball, you know?
And maybe Iím a bit jaded by the idiot liberals who always seem to be bothering me. Iím sure there are just as many dipshit republicans running around, but at least they arenít constantly bitching to me about politics. Maybe itís because they backed the winner, I donít know. Whatever it is, you can hardly swing a dead cat without hitting some whiney college student talking about how our countryís going to Hell, or some hippy lunatic who hasnít brushed his teeth, heís like forty nine years old and marching around in his sandals and talking about maybe Iíll be more interested in what he has to say when I get drafted and have to go over-seas and die with my buddies. Iím serious, man, this kind of crap really gets on my nerves. Note to the next Presidential candidate: if you want my vote, get on TV and tell your idiot followers to shut the hell up. Just tell them, ďLetís let people make their own decisions based on my actions and my policies, okay? You donít need to follow them down the street telling them about how theyíre killing babies or gays or soldiers, or whatever. If you feel the urge to badger people, run out, brush your teeth and your hair, maybe start a cult or something. Something where people can come and find YOU if they want to listen to your foolish nonsense.Ē
Anyway, thatís my rant for tonight. And if you got bored, too bad for you, but at least I didnít follow you down the street screaming this crap at you and smelling like a dogís ass.